Broken Girl

When I look in your eyes,
I see the shadow of a monster that hides right behind,
waiting until it's dark to come and chase me.
And when mommies gone,
you say, "shhhhh..",
and you kiss me, and say i belong,
with you.
but this secret is killing me.
Every mirror I look in,
I see pieces of me that want to break free.
but I just pretend that I'm like everyone else I see.
And I sit here and cry.
There are pieces of me that are broken inside,
but there is no safe place that I can hide, from him.
And this sick dirty man,
spreads his sickness on me, and takes all that I am.
He beats and breaks me,
Until I bleed again.

Thank you Daddy.
Thank you for all of the nights,
when I lay wide awake fighting all of the shame that's within,
so that it won't strangle me.
Thank you for all of the fear,
and the tears and the pain, in your sick twisted game.
I guess this is what they call a family.
Thank you for all of the screams,
that I yelled in my head, every night after bed,
as you lay upon me.

And so I lay here for you,
and with every touch I smell mommies perfume.
I wish she would only just believe,
and save me...
And I think if I was dead,
that there would be nothing that you could do to hurt me then,
and maybe I could feel safe once again,
from the monster that hides right in back of the man,
that made me.

** this poem is dedicated to the broken girls out there. my prayer is that you know that someone cares, that you find the courage to tell someone, to fight, and most importantly that you know.. it's not your fault. You are a victim. **