more common than sense

"maybe I need just a little more than this", she said to herself, not realizing she was listening. "maybe the love that you give me runs cold, maybe this time with you has made my heart old years before it's day? And still.........I choose to stay......lost between you and me". "Confusion" she said, " is that you? You had left for a while and I wasn't sure what to do.........on my own. Now that your back I feel like me, like uncertain me, wholly incomplete." and the light in her eye retreats as she finds comfort in the familiar. It was exciting though? wasn't it? thinking that she might find her way on her own? thinking she might.........feel.....for herself, and maybe let her heart stop for a moment to catch it's breath. After all a geriatric heart with it's day pass to dementia deserves to stop and smell the roses once in a while, to just for a moment, experience a smile. But honestly compassion and understanding were never suits that she wore around home. "I wear them for company, for family and friends" she said wide eyed and stoic, for the simple fact that sympathizing with her own hearts desires never had the longevity one requires. Her moments of clarity where exactly that....moments. So it's seems that her senile old heart will forget what it needs. It will forget what is right, why it loves, why it beats...... considering "Confusion" is the nurse she employs, the prognosis looks grim. I mean seriously, "Confusion" never really remembers what's going on, not the facts anyway, just it's version of them. It's much too busy trying to hide from what's wrong.